Narcissistic Personality Disorder is such a personality disorder that causes a state of mind in which the individual craves intense admiration and feels the need to become the center of attraction for the people around him. He feels more substantial and treats himself as a special fellow than others.
With his inflated sense of self-importance, he fails to have healthy relationships and thus ends up having troubled or toxic relationships. Though such individuals show themselves to be confident enough yet, there lies a fallible self-pride behind their fake self-made personality.
Moreover, narcissistic personality disorder causes trouble for the individual almost in every aspect of his life. Such an individual may suffer due to this disorder in the workplace, in relationships, at home, or even financially. As they feel significant figures in their society, they expect special treatment from others. But if they haven’t treated the way they have been thinking of, they tend to stay unhappy and disappointed.
Also, they become aggressively demanding, making others feeling unhappy around them.
People with a narcissistic personality disorder, imagine themselves having a high image. To change that imagination into reality takes a lot of work, this is where they fail to do so, and their failure turns them out as being harsh, manipulative, and arrogant.
It’s not that they love themselves, but they love the false self-image that they have created in their minds. To maintain and bring about that delusion before the world seems out as a tiring and impossible challenge to them. Therefore, they play blaming games and criticizes others instead of accepting their faults or weaknesses, which boosts their self-pride.
The reason behind their self-made image is the underlying insecurities that compel them to think of themselves as being the perfectionist. The achievements that they can not think of attaining, in reality, would force them to create an image of themselves having achieved it the other way.
Moreover, with their inflated sense of self-esteem, they can not bear to stand even any slightest criticism because they fear their weaknesses would ruin their self-image that satisfies and overcome their hidden insecurities.
They cannot think of themselves being weak or ordinary as others.
Also, they tend to hide their genuine emotions; this is why they are recognized as being empathetic towards others. Their insecurities about themselves and others never let them share or talk about how they feel. That is why it gets complicated to understand them and diagnose them with such a personality disorder.
SYMPTOMS OF NPD
Common symptoms of NPD are listed below:
They think of themselves as prominent figures of society and expect others to treat them as extraordinary beings. Also, they criticize others thinking of themselves as being superior over them.
They often tend to seek excessive praise from others even when they haven’t done something deservedly. They kind of have an obsession with seeking constant approval and affirmation from others. Such individuals act in such a way to satisfy their ego.
They often take exaggeration in charge while talking about themselves. To impress others and make them believe that they are perfect in every field of their life, whether it be their job or relationship, they exaggerate their achievements and praise themselves excessively.
They treat themselves as superior over others. They think no one is talented as much as they are. Also, they won’t even think of others being better than them in any way. They want others to treat them as unique, and they believe that only special people can understand them.
They are so obsessed with their thoughts and desires to accomplish that they hardly bother to think of others’ feelings. It won’t bother them to neglect the needs of people around them because they prioritize themselves over others.
They are often jealous of others who tend out to be more talented than them, and that’s what they can’t stand or bear. They want to appear perfect, unlike anyone else.
They live within their world of fantasies about having immense power, victory, perfection, beauty, etc. That is what they can’t get in the real world. Hence they imagine achieving all such things in dreams which satisfy their ego and overcome their insecurities.
They never miss any opportunity to belittle others. They would make use of your words and actions against you with such perfection that you won’t even be able to defend yourself or explain anything to them. Also, they would make you feel guilty when you won’t even be.
They behave arrogantly, giving instructions to others about how a task should be done without considering the opinions of others. As they want everything perfect, they lead others, thinking of themselves as being the controller and smartest, among others.
As they have created big self-images of themselves, they look down upon people who are inferior to them. They criticize others and make fun of them to satisfy their ego.
Individuals with NPD are often anxious. They want things done on time or even before time. They are never born to be patient to take something for so long.
They become angry very often, especially if not treated in a unique manner of what they have been thinking. Also, if something is undertaken against their will, they would react aggressively. Moreover, they usually tend to act with rage to get control of others and to make them feel guilty without any cause.
They are depressed easily due to the inability to cope with their emotions and sudden interpersonal problems that stress them out. To overcome their insecurities, they act out harshly and bossily because they fail to think of some other appropriate way to cope with their psychological problems. Instead of working on their weak areas, they take hold of weaknesses of others and humiliate them to hide their insecurities.
CAUSES OF NPD
A narcissistic personality disorder may be associated with the following factors as:
- ENVIRONMENTAL FACTORS:
Such individuals would have been experiencing childhood abuse, excessive praise over good behavior, or unwarranted criticism over bad ones. Moreover, they would have been suffering unreliable care from parents, or others would have been ignoring them, or people would have been praising them for something not based on reality. That would have made them think of false self-image for themselves leading to narcissistic personality disorder.
- GENETIC FACTORS:
Such factors include those inherited characteristics from parents or ancestors through genes. Those characteristics may consist of oversensitive temperament etc.
- NEUROBIOLOGICAL FACTORS:
Neurobiological factors are associated with the functioning or malfunctioning of the mental processes, including thoughts, cognitive development, memory, and the relation or link between the mind and the behavior of an individual.
Significant types of NPD are as follows:
It is a sort of narcissistic personality disorder In which an individual perceives a false image of himself as unique and superior over others. Such individuals think that only special people like them can only understand them.
They expect too much, especially about being treated unusually than other ordinary people. People with GNs live in their self-made world of fantasy. They have made a high image of themselves and often expects the world to treat them accordingly. If they haven’t treated as they have been expecting, they act out violently outrageous.
As they have an elevated sense of supremacy, they behave bossily and are always dominating others. They crave for constant admiration and appreciation even when they don’t deserve to get it. Also, they are usually perceived as empathetic because they think of only themselves as more important than others, so they hardly care about others’ feelings.
To boost their ego, they humiliate and criticize people who are inferior to them. That doesn’t mean that they spare people who are more talented than them; they hate them and make conspiracies against them to harm them at any cost. As they are coward to accept their weaknesses, they lack the courage to take someone else’s sturdiness.
They are obsessed with themselves and love to admire themselves. Such individuals often take exaggeration in charge. Hence, they are great liars as well. What’s more, they are quite arrogant and are smart enough to get control over others’ life. Also, they are manipulative, which means they know when and how to make someone suffer without even them knowing.
They cannot understand and cope with their emotions due to which they are often stressed out. Also, being depressed, they fail to make firm decisions.
People suffer a lot because of their inpatient and impulsive nature. As they want everything to be done in a perfect way and before its due time, they tend to deal with others harshly and arrogantly. Hence, they are mean and stubborn.
People with GNs are more prone to have broken relationships because of their arrogant, harsh, and empathetic attitude. They often act out selfishly without being bothered about the consequences. People hate and avoid them as soon as the spell of GNs charming personality gets off their heads, revealing their bitter but true identity.
- VULNERABLE NARCISSISM
There are two sub-types of vulnerable narcissism discussed as below:
- Positive self-image:
It is associated with a sense of superiority. Individuals with such type of narcissism think of themselves as being the perfect version of human beings. They are obsessed with the thought of prestige, and arrogance is the primary trait that makes them look down upon the people who are inferior to them. When they receive positive feedback from society, their positive self-image boosts up, and they feel more confident and self-esteemed.
It is what keeps them motivated towards achieving their goal. But if they face a negative response, hurting their ego, they end up being violently outrageous. To push back all their weaknesses or negative thoughts that make them feel pathetic about themselves, they help themselves by creating a positive self-image. Though it’s healthy to have created your positive self-image, yet it is destructive if taken advantage of it for humiliating others.
- Negative Self-image:
It is associated with humiliation and disgrace. If they experience external criticism, it provokes their feelings of loss and weaknesses that they acquire but keeps them hidden from the world. Hostile or harsh feedback of family members and close friends arouses the senses of poor self-esteem accompanied by feelings of unwanted, which makes them feel coward.
Hence, they end up ignoring the opportunities of learning in their life. Also, they have difficulty dealing with their emotions and controlling them. Moreover, they are worst at making sound and firm decisions.
Whether it is a positive or negative self-image, it is developed with constant feedback from family and close friends. There is a significant role in childhood experience for acquiring self-images. If an individual has been experiencing harsh criticism and ignorance in his childhood span, he tends out to have low self-esteem and hesitation in expressing their thoughts, emotions, etc. Also, they have trust issues and insecurities that they keep hidden from people.
If an individual has grown up with care, affection, and admiration, he tends out to be optimistic and confident in the future. That is because his family and close friends have been giving him positive feedback about him, compelling him to have a positive self-image.
However, above-discussed traits are common in every individual, but what differentiates it from normal behavior or attitude is its use as a weapon for Vulnerable narcissism. Vulnerable narcissists are highly sensitive, and this is the reason that they are either too confident or too coward. They also have symptoms of Borderline personality disorder as well.
Unlike GNs, they believe that people can’t see their uniqueness, and they often blame others even when they are faulty of doing something wrong. Also, they are not charming enough like GNs. They act out to be introverted and stay silent, unlike GNs who talk too much, often exaggerating things to praise themselves. But VNs are more prone to depression and anxiety as they are highly emotional and are poor at controlling their emotions.
It is also because they tend to overthink, and are often busy with the inner conflicts due to which they are also known as self-absorbed personalities.
Moreover, VNs tend out to be incompatible with insignificant aspects of their lives because of their poor decision-making ability. Due to which they may leave their jobs without any solid reasons and suffer financially. Also, because of their unrealistic attitude and imaginations, people avoid being with them in any relationship.
Despite these significant differences between GNs and VNs, there are many other things common among them. For instance, both of them are quite away from reality, perceive themselves as being superior over others; they aren’t born to accept their faults, and so on.
Some blueprints, to protect yourself or to deal out smartly with narcissists, are stated as follows;
- Dealing outmaneuver with narcissists:
It is very crucial to think before making any deal with them because they would treat you the harsh way to ruin you. Hence, it is better to ignore them and think before being used as a puppet in their hands.
- Learn and understand NPD:
Dealing with narcissistic isn’t something easy, especially if a narcissist is someone very close to you. So to outdo them, it is essential to acquire knowledge about narcissism personality disorder to beat off their narcissistic attitude.
- Take charge of your life:
Never allow anyone to take all substantial decisions of your life for you. It’s your life. Just don’t ruin it for someone who doesn’t even care about you. Take control of your life in your hands and lead the way to the dream of your life.
- Don’t fight back with them:
It is useless to indulge yourself in a fight with them. Instead of fighting back with them, learn to ignore them, and let go of what should be. Narcissists are aggressive, and they don’t even require any reason to fight for, so leave them alone with their big egos.
- Learn to ignore:
Narcissists are mean, and they would do anything to use you for their benefit. But the misery doesn’t end up here because they crave more and more. They would talk rubbish about you to manipulate you and make you feel worthless even if you have done nothing wrong.
So learn to ignore them as much as you can. Remember that their ego will reach their peak if you will keep on giving them importance more than ever. Hence, it is better to make them know where they stand in your life.
- Respect them anyways:
No matter how they treat you, but that shouldn’t stop you from respecting them. It is the only way to establish a peaceful environment all around. Do not forget to remind yourself that NPD is a disorder, so treat narcissistic accordingly.